Member-only story
Drowning Without My Hormones
PMDD is a serious foe, not to be ignored
Since the Winter Solstice I’ve been publishing here on Medium at least daily. It was a Solstice commitment I made to myself — just publish everyday. Don’t push myself to write something WOW every day, just publish everyday and trust that was practice and discipline I will hone my voice… Trust that Creativity is helping me heal:
But Tuesday I crashed.
I crashed hard.
My hormones tanked much faster, much harder, much deeper than they usually do by Tuesday of a ‘placebo week’.
By bedtime on Tuesday night I was actively suicidal again, terrified, crying, without any hope….
Thank god for my husband being here, reminding me to breath, reminding me this is my hormones torturing me, that it will get better and in only a matter of days…
Still, I went to bed crying in despair.
….
Then I woke up Wednesday and took my hormones, which had arrived by mail, went to work grumpy and struggling so hard not…
